here's what happened...
i was supposed to pick my car up between saturday and today, but of course, things didn't go smoothly and the car ended up being ready today, but i didn't have a way to get there! doh! i really wanted to see shane before he left. i shaved my naughty bits and everything else too! i have this weird idea that maybe we'll have just one last special moment together. i already know it won't happen, but do i listen to myself? never. why do i even have a conscience when my impulses do what they want anyway?
so, we IM each other and minus all the small talk, i told him that i missed him and asked if he had missed me, he said, "yeah and no." what does that mean? i don't know. you can't read into that kind of response, well, you can let your mind assume things. anyway, i told him that i still loved him and he didn't say anything back. ouch.
why do i act the way i do with him? i keep thinking that i'll never find anyone like him. no one will love me. if someone does love me, will i be over shane to love them in return?
guess what? i'm going on a road trip next week. washington, here i come!
12:46 a.m. - March 10, 2006
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