75% of the contents of my apartment is gone. i've given alot of it away and i've also dumped alot of it. my possesions are just that. possesions. nothing i need. nothing i want. material non-necessities. i can't wait to move. i'm excited to turn a new leaf. i'm scared to depend on my parents. i'm scared i'll hate where i'm moving to. i'm scared i'll fall into the same life i've led everywhere i've ever lived.
what will i do with this opportunity?
on another note, what the fuck am i doing with jonni? lol. for his bday i bought him some anal toys. why? i dont fucking know. i think its fun, but is that an appropriate gift? i found out over the weekend that even though i feel like i can tell him anything, he doesn't feel the same about me. i think that i have this meter in my head thats broken when it comes to friends. i assume alot of things and maybe alot of things are one sided. fuck, i know alot of things are one sided. however, i know that after the fact. sigh. what do you do? i can't help but give all of myself to friends. everything about me is up on the table to pick apart.
i just assume others are like that too.
4:47 a.m. - July 21, 2008
Recent entries:
solitude - March 31, 2014
Je suis triste... - June 28, 2013
I thought I found what I always wanted - June 25, 2013
oh you delicate heart... - June 18, 2013
all the small things... - May 21, 2013
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