First, I need to take a deep breath and calm down. My life isn't over. It isn't the end of the world. Life goes on.
I need to get rid of all the physical items that remind me of him and her. (except for the Beck CD, he didn't do anything to deserve being thrown away.)
I can no longer listen to sad, depressing music. It will be removed from my car immediately. Marilyn Manson here I come!
Get over it already! He isn't your world. My life does not revolve around him. No one should be that important in my life except me.
Just keep remembering that he is MARRIED. He does not love you.
It's not my fault, it's not his fault.
Try not to focus so much on what happened. I need to get my ass in gear and get back into the groove of school. I know it sucks, but, I can do it. I can't fail when I'm so close to getting my associates.
I can't expect the sadness to go away quickly. It takes TIME to heal.
I CANNOT allow myself to drink, cut or smoke my problems away. That never works. I'll just end up getting more hurt in the end.
I will not lock myself in my room and become reclusive again.
This one is important...
DO NOT ALLOW YOURSELF TO HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX EVER AGAIN! BIG MISTAKE! I felt like shit when he told me that he had had sex with kelly the same day he had sex with me and we had unprotected sex which is what he has with her. How fucked up is that? Plus, she's been with MANY men and has had unprotected sex with several of them, this I know.
I SAY AGAIN...NO MORE, ABSOLUTELY NO MORE UNPROTECTED SEX! EVER!
10:56 a.m. - 2003-10-08
Recent entries:
solitude - March 31, 2014
Je suis triste... - June 28, 2013
I thought I found what I always wanted - June 25, 2013
oh you delicate heart... - June 18, 2013
all the small things... - May 21, 2013
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